Pachanga Diaries

A partially-eaten strawberry pancake purportedly showing a holy image has attracted 100,000 hits on the eBay auction website. A Boulder woman put the pancake up for sale, saying it has brought her great luck since she found it three months ago. eBay originally withdrew the item, suspecting it might be a joke. But it has now apparently been reassured that the offering is genuine. The snack has attracted a bid – thought to be a hoax – of $99.9m. Diana Duyser, 52, of Boulder, Colorado, set a starting price of $3,000, and pleaded with people not to post hoax bids. ‘Total shock’ She described how she came across the mysterious breakfast.

I made this pancake 3 months ago. When I took a bite out of it, I saw a face looking up at me – it was Virgin Pachanga Diaries starring (sic) back at me. I was in total shock, she explained.

Mrs Duyser has since kept the pancake in a plastic frame on a stand.

I do believe that this is the Holy Pachanga Diaries Diana Duyser – Boulder, CO

She says three months from its conception, it has not shown any sign of crumbling – which she considers "a miracle". She also believes its mystical properties have brought her blessings, including $70,000 won in a nearby casino. Other visitors to the website were skeptical, however. Mocking imitators posted pictures of Elvis and a "burnt George Bush" depicted on slices of toast. Another tried to sell T-shirts showing Mrs Duyser’s pancake, while a budding artist posted a watercolor based on the image. There were no bids. Mr. Duyser dismissed the naysayers.

I do believe that this is the Holy Pachanga Diaries, she proclaimed.

eBay spokesman Hani Durzy said the company had decided to allow the auction to continue. "There’s nothing to indicate that the seller isn’t willing to give up this cheese sandwich to the highest bidder," he said. But Mrs Duyser added a note for any misguided bidder who might consider paying thousands – or millions – of dollars for a blessed breakfast snack. "I would like all bidders to know that this item is not intended for consumption," she made clear.

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During new year’s eve I got together with probably Boulder Best Robot Dancers. We decided to have a friendly competition. This are not your typical popping dance moves. Watch the video and let us know who won;

• Juanita,
• Monica, or
• Thomas

The video camera didn’t have enough battery to film the robot dancing style I learned from David Elsewhere but here is a very similar example …

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We all want to improve our relationships and dating, in 2009. Most likely, if you are a guy you also want to improve your dancing – Believe me … you do -

By accident, I have found six common rules to relationships, dating and dancing that simplified and improved my social life tremendously in 2008.

First, let’s look at how I got there after a period of depression and human misery.

Human Misery

Trying to snap out of a depression I decided to take and a basic improvisation class at the end of 2007.

During class exercises most students found me funny. Of course, I wasn’t even trying to be funny. I really wanted to cry and smoke cigarettes to treat my depression.

Curiously, those who tried to be funny didn’t get many laughs. By the end of the class they were naturally funny and have even improved their quality of social life.

- I guess human misery is funny; Pass me the whiskey bottle -

Six Basic Rules of Improvisation

In the second improvisation class the teacher introduced, six basic rules of improvisation.

Life is an art, very much like improvisation, and also a craft. A craft is something that is learned through practice, repetition, trial, error and oh, yes, hard work.

As with any art form, you can break all of the rules and still have a quality life. However, those best able to break the rules are those who first learn and understand them.

So, let’s look at some of the basic rules of The Art of Life Improvisation - The leader follows the follower and the follower follows the leader;

• Say “Yes!”. For a story to be built, whether it is short form or long form, the players have to agree to the basic situation and set-up. The who, what, and where have to be developed for a scene to work.

Dancing

Relationships and Dating are like dancing; The leader follows the follower’s body language and the follower follows the leader. It is a beautiful lifelong dance.

In 2009 improve your communication skills, relationship, friendships, dating and dancing by saying yes, being specific, focus, keeping the flow and change, change, change.

Keep it on your tip toes always fun and interesting.

Wishing you the best this new year,

Pachanga Diaries

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Pen and paper at hand, I sat down and wrote a letter to Santa a few weeks ago;

Dear Santa,

This year I have definitely tried to be good.

But … some naughty girls have taken me away from the path of becoming a good boy. Like one of those girls would say; “what to do?”.

At least I have tried. Hopefully this counts towards some good boy scout points. Here is a picture of what I would like to get for Christmas. I’m pretty sure my naughty friends will appreciate this gift as well.

P.S. I made some “happy brownies ” instead of cookies. They are under the Christmas tree next to the bag of Doritos and colorful caleidoscope. I know these “happy brownies” really make you go Ho, Ho, Ho !

Merry Christmas,

Pachanga Diaries

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Every year, during the holidays me and my posse prepare something special for the Pachanga Diaries fans. This year we spent some time rehearsing our Christmas Dancing Moves 2008 here in comedy city. I gathered around my non society friends that are always dancing and having a good time no matter what. For this video dance off we decided to dress up as elves and shake it out there disco style. Stay tuned for the coming up video updates;

Christmas Joke

- Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem. Do you want more Christmas jokes? I’m having an Update Christmas Jokes series until the 24th. Follow me on; http://www.twitter.com/pachangadiaries

Tell a Friend

Want more pachanga? sign up by sending an email to; pachangadiaries@aweber.com

Back to the Future

or travel back in time to 1977, when I first asked a girl to dance, by clicking on; http://www.pachangadiaries.com/1977/01/back-to-the-future/

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Very much like the movie Being John Malkovich nowadays we have technology to easily know how is it to be inside someone else mind.

No, I’m no talking about a secret tunnel behind some filing cabinets. That was the exisitng technology back then when that movie was filmed.

Today, we have twitter.com. Twitter allows you to share your thoughts with your friends, even from your cellphone.

This is a great tool for marketing your business and/or brand.

What? you don’t get it … You don’t have to.

Play with Twitter and you’ll get hooked. I could go on and on about why these tools are addictive and give you a bla, bla, bla for 30 minutes over coffee but I won’t.

Follow me on twitter;

http://www.twitter.com/pachangadiaries

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After watching this video I realize it is time for a mental note. Let’s recap on how to undo her bra with one hand.

Non Socialite Pachanga Diaries has always been confused and fascinated by how women think.

Does she want me to want to want her?

Is she going to like this set of pots for Christmas?

- She has been talking about it the whole year.

What does she mean when she asks; What are you thinking?

- What? am I thinking right now?

Video Recap

• Flowers
• Romantic comedy
• Listen more than I talk
• Tasteful Jokes
• Shave and spray
• Tongue scrapping

Now, ready to make the move to second base. Soft kissing is obligatory as well as hair stroking … and more hair stroking.

Must remember; “the bra is my enemy“.

Cold hands are not sexy therefore I should wash my hand with warm water … and make sure they are dry.

Practice Luke, practice. The pinch is probably the most difficult part of this video. At least is what I’d heard …

Want to learn more?

www.girlfriendpedia.com

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It has been tough for some of my male friends to read the signs women send when they are loosing interest. One of them asked me, – “how can I tell when the passion is gone? Is it when she start complaining about my socks on the floor?” You are asking me? I have no clue – I thought. But, here are seven signs to watch for;

1. She finds you annoying
2. You get a list of all your faults … and then some.
3. You try to get the magic back. But … she is not really into magic anymore.
4. Things don’t make sense. Ok, this one is tricky because most of the time they don’t.
5. Now … she is gay. Mmmmh, she never complained before.
6. Start finding weird dead things
7. Everything is drama and you don’t care anymore

My dear friend, watch this funny video about “How to tell when a relationship is over”.

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Pachanga Diaries goes Back to the Future. Since back in 1977 I was already fascinated by dancing. This picture shows my first dance with a kindergarten girl called Lucy. I have always been a very high energy boy … and curious.

We were dancing Vals. It wasn’t until ten years later that I was introduced to New Wave (yes, new wave. I know, I was a dancing freak out there on the floor) and then salsa dancing. I think I could handle it since I was five and a half. You can tell by my little smile. Little V. was thinking – “Me likey !” Picture circa January 1977

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